he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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