My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Your cock deserves a montage
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
