I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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