I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Someone shattered a urinal.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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