It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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