I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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