I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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