I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Randomize
