We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
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