I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Watching her eat just hurts me
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
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