I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
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