pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.