Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
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