dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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