fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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