the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
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