2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
