You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize
