fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
MIDGETS
????
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Randomize
