this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
