I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Randomize
