You're earring is so big in my mouth
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
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