it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Randomize
