He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
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