So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Randomize
