Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize
