the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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