Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
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