who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
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