I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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