So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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