You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Randomize
