dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
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