Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize
