then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
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