I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Randomize
