nut hugger
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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