angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Couch. On fire.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize