I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
This couple is walking their pig around campus
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize