apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Randomize
