You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Go christen that room with your naked body.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
