Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
True strength comes from lack of pants
Randomize
