Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
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And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
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Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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