dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
