I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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