you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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