Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Randomize
