Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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