It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
