The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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