Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Everclear isn't food dammit
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
